Before I leap headlong into this post, I must point out for those that don’t know me that well, I am a vegetarian and a huge animal lover. Many may seriously doubt those facts after reading this post. I’m even having doubts myself about my love of all things furry at the moment 🙄
Over the past few years I’ve dabbled with growing a bit of fruit & veg in our garden and I do mean dabbled. Despite throwing all sorts of things into our soil & into an assortment of pots we’ve managed about 6 tomatoes, 3 chillies, a complete bucket full of minuscule beetroot (I think even ‘baby beet’ would be a massive exaggeration!!!), a handful of marble sized radishes, one courgette, 2 strawberries, some rather twisted carrots, a few spindly spring onions and 1 gourd (which you can’t even eat!!!) in almost three years. It’s hardly River Cottage proportions and is, as you can imagine, a tad disappointing. In fact the only thing we’ve been able to successfully grow is blackberries (which were in our garden when we bought the house and I’m convinced would continue to grow after the apocalypse!!!), French beans (but I wish I’d planted them earlier) and spuds (even if they were a little small). So, as you can see, it’s not been a total failure. But this year I’ve been more determined than ever to finally crack this veg growing lark. For a good few weeks now, I’ve had tomatoes, beans, beetroot and spuds all growing indoors to give them a good head-start for when they finally get potted out…
Unfortunately my nemesis, public enemy No1. Mr. Evil himself has also doubled his efforts to thwart me this year…
And regardless of how cute this little fucker looks, I HATE HIM and HE WILL DIE 👿
Not content with his feast of strawberries, courgettes and sunflowers from previous years, the bouncy little nibbly shit is back for more and he’s now starting to annoy me BIG TIME.
Last week, with the ‘help’ (mmm?) of Sawyer, I planted French beans and potatoes into the garden. A day later one of the beans had been uprooted and 6 of the 8 potatoes had been removed from the soil. I planted more spuds and the following day they too had gone 👿 Tracy has already seen the little fucker digging around in our hanging baskets, so we know it’s him…
So in true Wile E Coyote style, I’m now out to get him. My 25 years of being vegetarian may soon come under serious threat as I would gladly barbecue this little menace on a spit and wash him down with a nice Chianti…
Watch this space…