French police today arrested a scientist working at Cern’s Large Hadron Collider, who had suspected links with Al-Qaeda. Full story here…
The Collider, for those who may have forgotten, is the world ending doomsday machine (well that’s what some may say 😎 ) that hopes to recreate the ‘Big Bang’. Whereas Al-Qaeda, for those who may have spent the last 10 years in a cupboard, is the organisation responsible for probably the most devastating acts of terrorism in the modern era. In my book Al-Qaeda & the Hadron Collider is not the most reassuring double-act 😯
I am of course just getting overly worried, as staff at Cern have said there’s nothing really to worry about… Oh that’s alright then 🙄
Phil Upton
Fear not! The production of the Higgs-Boson if CERN is successful is most likely to produce a ‘ripple’ in the space-time continuum, think; Big Bang=Lake Victoria CERN=pebble throw into Lake Victoria, though that ripple could be used in the future as an anchor point for a stable worm hole allowing the future to go back in time an visit us. The prospect of the creation of an all consuming Strangelet; an anti mater particle that annihilates all matter it comes in contact with is unproven nay unlikely! Well considerably less likely than the production of the Higgs-Boson! See nothing to worry about!!
stephen
Aha Mr Smarty Pants… What if Al-Qaeda are planning to use the Collider to return to 2009 from the future??? A future where Al-Qaeda are armed to the teeth with super zapping lazers 😯
Not so clever now are we 😉
Sophie
Now youve got me scared all over again.
What happens if they remove all the safety devices in the future and send it back in time???
Phil Upton
Ah right the paradox issue! You can’t go back in time and destroy the ‘present’ as ‘your future’ won’t exist ergo Al-Qaeda can’t come back from the future armed to the teeth with super zapping lasers to destroy us as they’d prevent their own future selves from existing and coming back and destroying us! See fear not! As far as the potential future goes!
Though the packets of lead protons the collider will be using to whizz round the ring at 99.9999991% of the speed of light (in opposite directions) when they collided will contain 1.15×1011 protons per packet, each packet carries the equivalent energy of 87Kg of TNT! That’s a bit worrying!
stephen
“You can’t go back in time and destroy the ‘present’ as ‘your future’ won’t exist ergo Al-Qaeda can’t come back from the future armed to the teeth with super zapping lasers to destroy us as they’d prevent their own future selves from existing and coming back and destroying us…
You’re really not thinking this through are you 😉 Surely this would be the ultimate Al-Qaeda suicide mission? Not only would they kill themselves, but they would also kill their future selves in the process!!! Not being an expert on Al-Qaeda protocol, I would imagine people would be queuing up for this mission 😯
Phil Upton
Genius! ‘nuf said!